Buyers in the sexual wellness industry bear a weighty responsibility. They must strike the perfect balance between meeting customers’ demonstrated needs with tried-and-true products, and staying on top of the latest trends — and that is only scratching the surface. They must exercise their purchasing power in a way that upholds their company’s values and vision, ensures customer satisfaction and sustains profitability. And, of course, by stocking the shelves of retail stores in communities worldwide, buyers help drive the visibility of sexual wellness products and the brands behind them.
This influential role makes buyers very popular with brands competing for attention and real estate in stores. With both new and established brands constantly pumping out and pitching new products, buyers’ purchasing decisions are becoming even trickier. Buyers, therefore, rely heavily on brand representatives to explain why a particular new toy is sure to spark demand among today’s shoppers.
For ambitious new brands, effectively engaging buyers can win their trust and increase the chances of ultimately attaining their business.
For ambitious new brands, effectively engaging buyers can win their trust and increase the chances of ultimately attaining their business. However, approaching a buyer requires strategy, insight and finesse. Some buyers prefer highly detailed product information during initial outreach, while others are more moved by a compelling story that adds depth and makes a brand more relatable.
“When we find brands’ backstories compelling, that helps us get behind them because we understand what they are about and why they exist,” says Daniel Miller, company director at Playharda Wholesale. “It’s great if you have a new product, but if you can explain why it was created, this is what consumers tend to enjoy, as they feel a more personal connection with the product and the brand.”
However, it is more than conveying a strong sense of the product and brand. Every retailer is different, so it is crucial to understand their company values and how specific products align with their core customer base.
Carly S., the product manager for Spectrum Boutique, emphasizes the importance of understanding where brand and retailer overlap in terms of voice and audience.
“Who is your primary customer, and do we have a crossover?” she asks. “You might have a fantastic product, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it will speak to my customer base.”
Understanding a company’s values and practices can help a new manufacturer optimize its communication approach and sales strategy. For example, if a brick-and-mortar retailer hosts frequent customer workshops, a brand might spotlight educational opportunities or marketing materials that the retailer could utilize in-store or distribute among staff.
Marketing Toolkit
While acquiring a purchase order and securing space on a retailer’s shelf is a huge win for a new brand, achieving this by no means marks the end of crucial communication between buyer and brand. On the contrary, this is where the relationship really begins.
It isn’t all about the first order. Ample and accessible support will maintain ongoing sales and create a positive relationship between the brand and the retailer. This requires stellar communication and providing tools for sales success — the true measure of which is consistent reorders, indicating steady consumer demand.
“In addition to the brand’s pricing and availability, we look at how easily support resources can be obtained,” says Kristyn Clarke, manager and buyer at His & Hers Couples Boutique.
Jessica DellaMonica, corporate buyer at Playtime Boutiques, concurs.
“Brand support is a big thing for me,” she says. “Will they do staff training, provide marketing materials and replace defective products?”
Examples of helpful brand support bonuses cited by retailers include handy, accessible digital or printable materials like product one-sheets, user guides, product images, product descriptions and FAQs, or branded social media posts for extra brownie points.
“Visual aids always help boost sales, particularly images of the product being worn or in a scene where people could imagine themselves,” Miller says. “These help to remove the product from a clinical, empty-looking scene and put it in a warmer, friendlier, more understandable context for the consumer, persuading them to buy. Videos also help in this way, especially online, by helping consumers better understand what they are buying and how to use it.”
Online retailers mainly rely on product images to drive sales. Betty’s Toy Box founder and CEO Carolyn Eagle says mood shots that clearly show a product’s size and shape are instrumental.
“When we started including images of dildos and vibes held in a person’s hand, sales noticeably increased on those items,” she says. “Bondage items shown on a model always outsell static product images. Quality images also give us a launching pad to create social content. I don’t think manufacturers realize the power of good images for online sales.”
Detailed product descriptions are also a must.
“I have passed on brands that don’t have readily accessible and detailed product information,” Eagle adds. “I won’t carry a dildo unless you can tell me the length, insertable length and girth, for example. That’s just common sense. Customers need to know what they’re getting, and there is no way I will measure every product myself. It’s the manufacturer’s job to help us sell their product, and if I do not get enough support, I won’t buy from them.”
To further support online retailers, brands can offer their support by driving traffic to online shops and promoting the partnership to their followers.
“We find a brand can influence 20-40% of sales by being able to redirect the traffic it gets on its website to ours,” says Jenny of India-based ecommerce site Imbesharam. “Partner in our ongoing social and online marketing activities by providing samples and testers to influencers, customers and our sales and OPS team.”
DellaMonica also suggests that brands offer fun and appealing preprogrammed video screens.
“If the display is interesting, the customer usually has no issue watching a quick video on the product, which helps make that sale,” she says.
When a buyer invests in new products, the initial purchase order is typically conservative. This is another reason why retail sales support is essential for product sales. Sales associates must be well-equipped with ample brand and product training before a new product hits the shelf to ensure they can effectively communicate its benefits and features to customers.
For new brands unfamiliar with practical merchandising tools, it is also helpful to consider what type of educational material or eye-catching display components will help sell the product without the customer having to ask a staff member or if a sales associate is not immediately available.
Breanna LeFevre, manager and buyer for Love Shack Lake Charles, recommends that manufacturers offer testers and signage, which she says make a difference in closing sales, especially for higher-priced rechargeable products and for shoppers who prefer less interaction.
“Even though we aim to help all our customers, sometimes you have customers who prefer to shop independently,” she says. “Having signage and displays that help them navigate can provide an easier experience and get them to the products they seek.”
Clarke seconds LeFevre’s point about testers.
“The best way to market a product in-store is to have a tester available for the customer to see and feel, which can influence their purchasing decisions,” Clarke says.
However, Smitten Premium Adult Boutique manager Nicole observes that point-of-purchase marketing materials have become less widely available, most likely due to the rise of online businesses.
“Brick-and-mortar stores can benefit greatly from these types of marketing materials by using them to set up entire shelving displays that feature the manufacturers’ products, catch the eye of customers as they walk by and help to provide education to customers who may be too shy to ask questions,” she says. “While some manufacturers have digital assets that can be printed or displayed in the store, the impact is less than a carefully curated POP display that helps to build brand awareness.”
Incentivizing shoppers and store salespeople also serves as a marketing tactic for pleasure products.
“Providing gifts with purchases, to add value to higher-end products, can be incredibly helpful for closing a sale if someone is on the fence,” Carly S. advises. “So can providing samples so customers can try your brand, fall in love and come back to purchase a full-size product.”
Keith Boswell, director of Be Daring the Adult Shop, is so confident that SPIFFs (Sales Performance Incentive Funds) are effective that his company matches suppliers’ dollar-for-dollar incentives for its sales team.
Sensually Yours General Manager Kyrie Hara also believes in incentivizing retail staff.
“Something as simple as giving stores toys to give to staff can often mean the difference between selling and stagnating,” she says. “It’s hard to sell something you don’t know or don’t have passion for.”
Other less-talked-about factors that may influence buyers’ purchasing decisions include limited shelf or wall space, heavy market oversaturation, lack of customer demand and a restricted spending budget. Much like dating, a purchasing decision might come down to timing and whether the market is ready for an unconventional or specialized product niche.
Unique Selling Points
As product innovation continually reshapes and redefines consumer expectations, industry buyers must stay apprised of unique and up-and-coming products, as well as seek products carefully curated to align with their customers’ established needs. Given the high volume of new products entering the market daily, buyers must also excel at the fine art of cutting through the noise to discern true quality and genuine innovation.
“There is a paradox of choice,” says Carly S. “You can have too many options or need more. You have to find that sweet spot.”
Staying ahead of tech advancements and trending products allows retailers to meet consumers’ growing demand for cutting-edge products.
Clarke notes, “I enjoy paying attention to trends. Is this product viral on social media, and why? Is this something new that could appeal to our specific demographics?”
However, buyers don’t solely base their purchasing decisions on the “latest and greatest” product. While viral trends might garner awareness, buyers can quickly discern whether a product is genuinely innovative or merely a private-labeled version of an existing item.
“We don’t want to compete with other wholesalers when selecting brands to add to our offerings,” says Miller. “There’s just no point. Instead, we look out for unique, quirky and different brands offering more than the same products in a different box.”
Packaging for Success
Stand-out packaging is also a crucial element in a buyer’s decision process.
“The packaging definitely sells products,” says Boswell. “From a customer perspective, packaging is one indication of quality.”
DellaMonica agrees, noting that underwhelming packaging will generate fewer sales and sell the brand short.
“The more beautiful the packaging, the more likely it will stand out on your shelves,” she says. “Sexy things sell. It’s just a fact.”
For a product to be sold in a His & Hers Couples Boutique, Clarke says, the packaging must be clean and fit the store’s aesthetic. Eagle says she features images of giftable-looking boxes when that is a selling point. For Carly S., meanwhile, packaging should convey only pertinent information about the item’s features, maintaining a careful balance with fun, creative marketing.
“Too little or too much information on packaging can be an issue,” Carly S. says.
Sex Shop Matamoros owner Polo Medina acknowledges that manufacturers may opt for less-than-ideal packaging to save money.
“What I don’t like is packaging that blocks the actual product, even when there is a picture of it,” he says. “I want my customers to have an actual look at the product.”
Nicole of Smitten Premium Adult Boutique says she’s seen the industry’s product packaging improve over time.
“Product packaging used to be much cruder, but while some packages may need some improvement, the vast majority seem to be on a much better trajectory than they used to be,” she says. “However, while I used to place more emphasis on packaging, over the past 15 years, packaging has become less of an issue than price point and quality.”
While trends have steered manufacturers toward mainstream-friendly packaging, Hara says that too-sterile packaging can also kill a sale.
“If something looks dated or like it comes from a clinic, we don’t pick it up,” she says.
How an item can be merchandised also plays a critical role in buyers’ decision-making, with versatility being key.
“When brands make their packaging multifaceted, it’s a big plus,” LeFevre says. “We use a mixture of slat walls and shelving, so I appreciate it when a product looks good and works on both.”
There are also practical considerations. Since packaging impacts shipping costs, buyers for online retailers factor in size and weight when determining whether to carry a product.
“Regarding global shipping costs, packaging must also be durable and sturdy,” Imbesharam’s Jenny says. “For example, Rocks-Off used to have large packaging. The product did not change, but they updated the packaging, and now it looks minimal, appealing and easy to ship. That increased our Rocks-Off sales by 33% over the same period last year.”
Product Pricing Strategy
While customers always want maximum value for their money, buyers are not necessarily swayed by bargain-basement prices. As DellaMonica puts it, “Any buyer would spend good money on products that are worth it.”
On the other hand, one major recurring topic of discussion between retailers and manufacturers is price undercutting. Product manufacturers must be mindful of staying competitive without undercutting and mind their MAP (Minimum Advertised Price) agreements, which establish the minimum price at which a product can be advertised in print and online.
“Suppose a manufacturer or brand has outpriced itself,” Miller posits. “In that case, it makes it incredibly difficult to offer their products to retailers — who, more than ever, need to create a healthy margin.”
Considering how many retailers have gone out of business due to third-party marketplaces, mass-market retail and notorious ecommerce undercutting practices, it is clear how vital it is for manufacturers to implement strategies like MAP. Even though customers nearly always seek the lowest price, these policies prevent undercutting, leading to stronger margins and reduced risk for retailers. This creates a level playing field so that retailers can stay competitive and thrive, while safeguarding the brand’s integrity and reputation.
Assessing Product Quality
For any manufacturer, brand or retailer, the goal is to build customer trust and encourage repeat business. Customers need to feel confident that they are purchasing high-quality products that represent good value for their money.
“There’s no way to move forward if the quality isn’t right,” Miller states. But what defines product quality from a buyer’s perspective, and how is it determined?
Buyers in the pleasure industry rely on hands-on experience and thorough research to evaluate a new product's quality and reliability.
“The only way to evaluate quality and reliability is to literally have the product in our hands,” Miller says. “We want to feel it, touch it, turn it on and feel the power.”
Hara echoes this sentiment.
“Touching a new product is always a good indicator of its quality,” she says. “I give major consideration to brands that will send me samples to see and use them to get my staff’s feedback.”
This approach allows for a tactile evaluation and involves the staff in decision-making, ensuring a well-rounded assessment.
Beyond physical samples, research and industry feedback play a significant role.
“I do my research, and I make it a habit to ask for the opinions of my industry colleagues,” DellaMonica says. “Word of mouth goes a long way.”
She also values the insights from testing products personally and with her staff, evaluating factors such as power, battery life, ease of use and consumer appeal.
Clarke favors a multifaceted approach to ensure products meet stringent quality standards before being introduced to His & Hers customers.
“We evaluate the quality and reliability of a new product by checking out buyer samples, reading online reviews and interacting with the products while attending industry trade shows,” she says.
DellaMonica also factors in a product's durability and warranty. This highlights how quality and value are intertwined; durable products with reliable warranties not only meet customer expectations but also enhance their overall perception of value.
Warranties and a brand’s past performance are likewise key indicators for Carly S.
“Warranties are a good place to start when looking at quality and reliability, since that’s how long they guarantee the product will work,” she says. “Then there’s the company’s track record. If I’ve sold your products before and received a bunch of defectives, I’m going to have less confidence in the reliability of new products.”
Reviews by end users also significantly influence whether buyers will replenish their supply of an item.
“We sometimes do test orders of small quantities, check the product’s performance and get customer feedback,” Imbesharam’s Jenny says. “That helps us decide whether we will stop stocking when we sell out, or restock in large quantities.”
Thanks to online reviews and social media, today’s customers have no trouble voicing their opinions. LeFevre says she follows what is said about products, good and bad.
“If customers have more issues than usual with specific brands or lines, I’ll consider that before repurchasing them,” she notes.
Medina also pays attention to online reviews, but cautiously.
“I try to determine whether the person is real or if it is just a made-up review,” he says. “If it appears to be legitimate, I take it seriously.”
Similarly, Carly S. says she suspects many reviews need more objectivity.
“Ultimately, I want to know if a product is good and not just if it worked for that person,” she says. “Because at the end of the day, just because it didn’t work for one person doesn’t mean it’s a bad product. You have to read between the lines. Was the product itself bad-quality or dangerous? Or was it just not the right toy for this person and what they were looking for? I’m always keeping an eye open for reviews that show a toy is easy to break or hurts a customer, but ultimately, I want to have a range of options for folks to choose from and make their own choices.”
Brand Champions
In addition to the products themselves, the people behind the brand play a significant role in gaining retailer trust. Reliability, enthusiasm and customer service set the foundation for a strong relationship with buyers, who value these attributes highly.
DellaMonica says that right off the bat, she takes note of the rep’s level of confidence.
“If you’re confident about your toys, it will inspire me to be excited about them too,” she says.
Just as buyers cater to the end customer, sales reps must cater to buyers by providing excellent customer service. That means being proactive, like responding promptly to defective product issues or following up with tracking information.
It also means cultivating a positive, long-term relationship with a buyer. Building a genuine personal rapport over time and maintaining a healthy balance between business and casual interactions, instead of constantly fishing for the next purchase order, can make the difference between a good rep and a remarkable rep.
The buyer’s role is pivotal in shaping the success of a retail business. Their keen eye for trends, strategic decision-making and ability to foster strong relationships with suppliers ensure that the store remains competitive and appealing to customers.
The rep-buyer relationship is therefore ultimately about finding the right fit. A manufacturer might be fully confident in its products, but true success boils down to the value that the end user experiences. What problem does the product solve? How easily can it be integrated into the customer’s lifestyle?
It can feel discouraging to be turned down by a buyer, but it is a natural part of the process. While rare “unicorn” buyers may immediately recognize the value of a product and place an order on the spot, most brands are more likely to receive 50-75 rejections for every magically satisfying “yes.” Perfectly tailoring a sales pitch to a prospective buyer typically requires a lot of tweaking, time and patience. The key is to get back up, polish that pitch, and keep knocking.
The role of retail store buyers is pivotal in shaping the success of a retail business. Their keen eye for trends, strategic decision-making, and ability to foster strong relationships with manufacturers keep stores competitive and draw customers. As the retail landscape evolves, the expertise and adaptability of pleasure product buyers will continue to be essential in navigating challenges and seizing new opportunities, ultimately contributing to the growth of the pleasure business.
