trends

Decompression Time

I've just returned from a much-needed and long-overdue vacation — my first "real" break in more than four years — and I have a few things that are still fresh in my mind that I'd like to share with you about my trip: things that might provide some food for thought over any current or future projects you might be working on.

The first thing on my mind is money: The vacation that my lovely wife Dawn and I took included an 11-day interisland cruise visiting all of the Hawaiian hotspots, with a little decompression time on Waikiki thrown in for good measure. All told, we spent around $15,000 on this trip, a huge sum of money for some folks; a drop in the bucket for others.

While we tend to be pretty careful with our spending, we're not afraid to spend when it's something that is important to us or that we want badly enough. I tend to think that this is the case with many consumers — especially those considering joining an adult website — where as I've opined before, they may be willing to spend the money but will only do so if the proposition is worth it to them.

Of course, what one person finds worth purchasing another person will pass by — and the decision isn't always one of means — but it is always one of desire. So if your sales are lacking, you might want to focus on increasing the desirability of your offers because doing so will make you more money. And money is what it is always about (or so I'm finally beginning to realize).

I've never really been financially motivated, meaning that money hasn't previously been all that much of a concern to me. But this trip changed all of that forever. You see, I'm one of those guys that always thought "a million dollars is enough" — but after doing a bit of property shopping while in Hawaii, "sticker shock" set in.

While a million and change will get me a decent place back home on the New Hampshire seacoast, it will only get me a partial ownership share on a prime beach-front property in Hawaii or allow me to buy a place in a good location, but a place that seems only a bit larger than the size of the walk-in closet in my current home.

On some of the properties I looked at, the only difference between spending $1.5 million and spending $3.5 million was the quality of the granite counter tops and the size of the bathtub. The square footage or desirability of the location wasn't necessarily increased. Want something really nice? Don't bother looking without at least $5 million to spend, and I'm not talking about mansions but about three-bedroom, two-bath homes.

The upshot for me is that I won't be retiring just yet. The upshot for you might be that while your prospects may be able to afford your $29.95 per-month membership fees, they may not be able to justify the expense in the current market — a market where many other options are available at much lower price points (or for free) — and especially if all they'll get between a $9.95 site and a $29.95 site is a handful of bonus feeds.

Customer Satisfaction
Another issue that I thought about while cruising is that of customer satisfaction: While most of my fellow passengers seemed quite pleased, I overheard several people grumble about sundry matters. Some of these folks seemed like the impossible to please types, but others seemed to have legitimate complaints.

The funny thing is, most kept their complaints to themselves, limiting their squawking to their fellow travelers, rather than bringing the issues to the ship's staff. The upshot here is that these well-paying customers will never return as repeat customers and the cruise line will never know why.

It's not that they didn't try to find out, however, as all passengers were presented with a comments questionnaire that was several pages long, had your personal information on it, and required filling in the little ovals to make multiple selections — exactly like the SAT and other tests that many of us remember from our school days. Given the size and complexity of the test (and the fact that many of our fellow passengers did not speak English), I have to doubt the efficacy of this questionnaire and wonder how many were simply disregarded and thrown into the trash can, costing a well-meaning company the valuable customer feedback it was seeking.

It's important to know what your customers are thinking, but if you make it too difficult or time-consuming for them to provide you with feedback, you simply won't receive it.

Finally, the other thing on my mind right now is the need for — and value of — taking time for reflection whether you're contemplating business issues, personal issues or both.

I find it hard to relax and spend time away from the computer. Indeed, this isn't my job but my lifestyle, which is why it's been so long since I took a real vacation — and by that I mean taking time away from my computer. I didn't bring the laptop with me, nor did I patronize any Internet cafes. I didn't bring my PSP so as to avoid the urge to seek out wi-fi connections, and my 3G RAZR 3 was turned off and locked in our stateroom mini-safe for most of the duration of our cruise (although I did power-up every few days to check for important messages and to keep up with the XBIZ SMS blasts — I can't be totally disconnected).

The result is that I enjoyed some much-needed quality time with my wife, and had the opportunity to distance myself from the little world I've been spinning my wheels in. This has allowed me a chance to take a fresher look at issues personally, professionally and beyond — all with a new perspective — and hopefully something great will come of it.

If it's been a while since you got away and took some time for yourself, then I suggest you do so as soon as possible. You'll thank yourself for it.

Related:  

Copyright © 2026 Adnet Media. All Rights Reserved. XBIZ is a trademark of Adnet Media.
Reproduction in whole or in part in any form or medium without express written permission is prohibited.

More Articles

opinion

How Adult Businesses Can Navigate Global Compliance Demands

The internet has made the world feel small. Case in point: Adult websites based in the U.S. are now getting letters from regulators demanding compliance with foreign laws, even if they don’t operate in those countries. Meanwhile, some U.S. website operators dealing with the patchwork of state-level age verification laws have considered incorporating offshore in the hopes of avoiding these new obligations — but even operators with no physical presence in the U.S. have been sued or threatened with claims for not following state AV laws.

Larry Walters ·
opinion

Top Tips for Bulletproof Creator Management Contracts

The creator management business is booming. Every week, it seems, a new agency emerges, promising to turn creators into stars, automate their fan interactions or triple their revenue through “secret” social strategies. The reality? Many of these agencies are operating with contracts that wouldn’t survive a single serious dispute — if they even have contracts at all.

Corey D. Silverstein ·
opinion

Building Sustainable Revenue Without Opt-Out Cross-Sales

Over the past year, we’ve seen growing pushback from acquirers on merchants using opt-out cross-sales — also known as negative option offers. This has been especially noticeable in the U.S. In fact, one of our acquirers now declines new merchants during onboarding if an opt-out flow is detected. Existing merchants submitting new URLs with opt-out cross-sales are being asked to remove them.

Cathy Beardsley ·
trends

How to Handle Payment Disputes Without Sacrificing Trust

You can run the best-managed and most compliant website out there, but that still doesn’t completely shield you from the risks tied to payment disputes. Buyer’s remorse, an unclear billing description or even a simple misunderstanding can lead a customer to dispute a transaction. Accumulate enough disputes, and both your reputation and revenue could be at risk.

Jonathan Corona ·
trends

WIA Profile: Taylor Moore

With a 70-person team and a growing slate of tools for content creators, the Teasy Agency has developed a reputation for putting talent first. That commitment owes a lot to co-founder Taylor Moore’s own experiences as a cam model.

Jackie Backman ·
profile

WIA Profile: Cathy Turns Creator Platform Experience Into a Model-First Playbook

As both a model and industry executive, Cathy lives in two worlds at once. “Since I do both things, I can act as the liaison between the model community and the rest of the SextPanther team,” she tells XBIZ.

Jackie Backman ·
opinion

From Compliance to Confidence: The Future of Safety in Adult Platforms

In numerous countries and U.S. states, laws now require platforms to prevent minors from accessing age-inappropriate material. But the need for safeguarding doesn’t end with age verification. Today’s online landscape also places adult companies at uniquely high risk for inadvertently facilitating exploitation, abuse or reputational harm, or of being accused of doing so.

Andy Lulham ·
opinion

What Adult Businesses Need to Know About Florida's Age Verification Law

The rise and proliferation of age verification laws has changed the landscape for the online adult industry. A recent and compelling example is the state of Florida, where Attorney General James Uthmeier has filed multiple complaints against major platforms as well as affiliates accused of violating the state’s AV law.

Corey D. Silverstein ·
opinion

Maintaining Brand Trust in the Face of Negative Press

Over the last year, several of our merchants have found themselves caught up in litigation over compliance with state age verification laws. Recently, Segpay itself was pulled into the spotlight, facing scrutiny over Florida’s AV statute, HB 3. These stories inevitably get picked up by both industry and mainstream news outlets.

Cathy Beardsley ·
opinion

How to Switch Payment Processors Without Disrupting Business

For many merchants, the idea of switching payment processors can feel pretty overwhelming. That’s understandable. After all, downtime can stall sales, recurring subscriptions can suddenly fail, or compliance gaps can put accounts at risk. Operating in a high-risk sector like the adult industry can further amplify the stress of transition.

Jonathan Corona ·
Show More